Oh Woe is the Lonely Accountant, Oh Woe is Me. (The Terrors of Financial Acc)

Do you know what a balance sheet is? DO YOU? Because if you don’t you’re failing Financial Accounting I at university. Yes, you are.

Let me bring your attention to a definition of the word

accounting:
[uh-koun-ting] – noun

the theory and system of setting up, maintaining, and auditing the books of a firm;

art of analyzing the financial position and operating results of a business
house from a study of its sales, purchases, overhead, etc

Which leads me to a further definition:

accountant
[uh-koun-tnt] – noun

a person who’s life is miserable because they make a living by calculating how much money someone infinitely richer than them has; who has no energy left at the end of the day to enjoy how blue the sky is, the chirping of birds, the green of the earth’s beautiful grass because they have spent the entire day acting as a glorified calculator; a person who has no time to do housework and thus ends up neglecting his/her children to the extant that welfare workers threaten to take them away because their parents are too busy number crunching.

What could have prompted my love for this 9:00 AM-every-Monday-morning class, you ask? The simple joy one derives from surprise quizzes (failing them), patrolling teachers (prepared to confiscate the cell phone of any poor student seeking relief via SMS), locked doors (to hold you prisoner, I tell you!), and of course – the wonderful seating arrangement.

My luck is such that by the time they got to my name (Zainab Zaheer Khawaja), they had run out of seats in the auditorium. So extra chairs were brought in for me and ten other lucky students and lined up against the back wall. And that is how I ended up sitting directly in front of the air conditioning unit. One day, as I was freezing to death like I do every Monday, I looked down, only to see Lo & Behold! a frog! It was brown, and not at all cute like those frogs you see on children’s TV. It was monstrous.

 

The Horror

 

Imagine my surprise when Mr. Frog was followed by yet another, from behind the air conditioning unit. The another. It seemed as if this would never end. In all, four froggies emerged. The Frog Birgade then proceeded to hop around in different directions as girls picked up their bags and pulled up their legs, muffling screams. This was all, of course, completely unnoticed by the lecturer.

Why notice petty things, when the world of accounting awaits?

I would like to sum all of this up by saying,
Accounting is FUN! 😉

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